by Meghan Ginley
“Tell me about your yoga journey.”
My first response is “Yoga changed my life.” But that statement is false. Because that is assuming that by practicing yoga, I have become someone “other” than I have been.
That is not true.
Yoga has made me more of who I am.
I have YouTube to thank.
Well, yes, that. And a woman by the name of Adriene Mischler. She is an Austin-based yoga teacher with a YouTube channel called Yoga with Adriene. An innocent search on January 6, 2017 for “free yoga videos online” landed me on her channel.
And nearly a year later, landed me in Yoga Teacher Training.
Well, whatever reasons I had in the beginning, I’ve learned there is SO much more to the world of yoga than I could’ve ever imagined. The state of my union at the moment is wonderfully tumultuous and exquisitely serene. My reality has been shaken up, I’m shining light in dark places, shifts are happening, and I feel as though these shifts and revealings are such that if I tried to logically understand what was happening, I would be doing myself a disservice.
Every morning I have the chance to turn inward with my sadhana. I step on my mat and have a chance to breathe, to tune in, and I think, “God, this feels good. I feel good.” I’m learning that the answers to the questions I’m asking myself have always been there. My sadhana allows me to tune in to my inner voice. Every day it’s like I’m getting to open up this advent calendar that’s tucked away deep inside somewhere, and each day I’m realizing things about my true self. (I haven’t found any chocolates yet tho…) I’m taking better care of myself. I am kinder to myself. My thoughts are positive. I’m gaining more courage to speak from the heart, setting fear aside. I’m recognizing the light in others. And I feel GOOD.
I’m beginning to think there are two things we humans must do in a lifetime: fall in love with ourselves and then, let that light shine love on others.
It hasn’t been easy. The process has frustrated me. I felt like I wasn’t doing enough. Learning Sanskrit is HARD. I like to do things perfectly, you know. I like to please people. I like to have things all figured out. Now I’m realizing how much time and energy I’ve spent on doing those things. Yoga has turned that all on it’s head. In this very moment, I feel ALL-right (like a Matthew-McConaughey-alright). I feel GOOD not doing things perfectly. I feel GOOD preferring to experience and experiment with something rather than try to make logical sense of it.
At this moment, there are some fascinating topics that we’ve been introduced to that I want to learn more about: the purusharthas, ayurveda, and mudra. I’ve been thinking a lot about my dharma, as many of us have. I’ve been thinking about the things I put into my body and how food can serve me. And just today at training with Lisa, touching my thumb to my pinky finger in a mudra opened the floodgates. (There might not be crying in baseball, but there’s crying in yoga teacher training.) How these techniques have an effect on me is nothing short of fascinating.
Yes, that’s also how I feel at the moment. Quite fascinated. Fascinated to know, to not know, to feel, and to see what it’s like to live vibrantly.
And the cool thing is… yoga is for anyone. For any BODY. I look forward to teaching yoga, continuing on my journey, and help others start on theirs.
Until then, I’ll keep my box of tissues close and my yoga mat closer.
I want to give a shout out to the other trainees: Caprice, Ethan, Jenny, Kt, Laura, Lindsay, Serena, Talya, Zanny and our guides: Will, Lisa, Meghan, Nick, Joseph, and all of our teachers, who are a constant source of love, support, and inspiration. Thank you. <3
Welcome to our Teacher Trainee blog. Throughout our 200 Hour Teacher Training session, we’ll feature a blog post written by one of our trainees. To find out more about the Hathavidya teacher training offered at Bread and Yoga, click here.